Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Don't Call It A Comeback

Did anyone hear anything about Britney Spears opening the MTV VMAs this year? Anyone? Oh yeah...how could you miss it. Any time I tuned into MTV there was a commercial for the VMAs featuring Ms. Spears. It was all over the gossip shows: Britney Spears to open VMAs and make her big comeback!

Are you serious?

She did some not funny, not convincing comedy skit with Jonah Hill. Then the cameras watched her walk from her dressing room to the stage to...

To perform? Nope. Just to say about 10 words and introduce the 25th anniversary of the VMAs. And she was holding the microphone so high, you couldn't even see her mouth moving.

Why all the hype if she wasn't even going to perform? I was looking forward to a train wreck or at least a half ass performance to prove she's still got it. Not a chance! I didn't get any of that.

You want to know what the icing on the cake was? It was the next morning when all the news shows were commenting on how great she was and how this stint on the VMAs was really going to boost her career. They can't be serious. Oh...but they were. Totally serious.
She read a teleprompter, won some awards and acted like a normal person and not a complete lunatic. Big deal. Can she still sing and dance? Does she have any "talent" left in her? I didn't get one grunt, one booty shake...nothing!
She didn't really prove anything to me with that appearance except that she's taking really good meds to keep her craziness to a minimum.
NOTE: The next time I talk about Britney Spears, it will be to explain the Britney 3000. It's the top secret machine that gives the illusion that Britney (and many other pop stars) can actually sing. I swear to god it exists. I can't prove it, like I can't prove that Elvis is still alive, but I know it exists!


Jay Amabile said...

AMEN! Right on girl! The VMA's suck EVERY year. The VMA's were AWESOME when I was a kid. What happened to Slash and Duff cursing up a storm drinking win during their time onstage as presenters? Heck...Poison performed at the VMA's ...and BON JOVI basically single handedly gave MTV the idea for UNPLUGGED. For the past 10 years or so (or more) they have sucked ass. This year it was like MTV was letting out one of those long neverending farts. The fact that Britney was the grabber was ridiculous. Who cares about her anymore? Anyone with a brain has moved on. Do people still care that she's a slob and doesn't have custody of her kids? This is old news. Resurrecting her career is pointless. Watching her come out and accept 24 awards and do a dull sketch with Jonah was bad. She made Jonah unfunny and I didn't think that was possible. All I have to say is MTV is the bane of existence. What do you say you and I take over the station for a day? We'll put some quality programming on there...

Hard Rock Hideout said...

I never thought she could sing at all. She used to be able to dance up a storm, but her voice is god awful in my opinion.

Mrs Munster said...

I wonder how much daddy Spears had paid for VMA to get his little girl there? I didn't see the show, but please, it was all set up. Her winning 3 awards...c'mon.

Hell On High Heels said...

Ms. Spears CAN'T sing. She's never been able to sing. It's all computer generated, and it makes me sick. Her career proves that a lot of money and good marketing can make any talentless twit a star.

And yes Mrs. Munster, you are SO right. That VMA "comeback" was totally set up. MTV is pathetic.